Sunday, September 27, 2009

Some Days, It Hits The Fan

Oh, nothing major. Just starting out to be a rough morning in the Moose Nugget Household.
Beans was fitful most of the night, but since J was at work and Little Nugget was permanently attached to my milking apparatus, it was difficult to go check on her. Every time I was able to disengage the avid milker, Beans would settle back down and I would decide that I should let sleeping girls lie.
Hmmm.
I woke this morning VERY early to cries of "Momma! POOP! Tummy Hurts!"
And in my pre-coffee stupor, I ended up sticking my hands in poop as I helped her get out of her underpants. I decided I should turn on the lights and assess the situation, and discovered that in addition to poop, she was covered head to toe in barf.
Argh!
I left her sitting on the potty to check out the full situation. Not good.
I dunked her in the tub and seriously started praying, "God, don't let it be swine flu!"

A side note here... I called for reinforcements. They still have not arrived. One day, I will discover the correct way to communicate that we need help and you need to get home.
Apparently, saying, "Um, half the upstairs is covered in poo and puke, both girls are hysterical, I have vomit in my hair and poop on my hands and shirt. I really could use some help!" is NOT the correct way to solicit help.
The response was: "Um, like RIGHT NOW? You need help now or all day or what?"
Just then, Beans pooped in the tub and started freaking out. I didn't have time to respond, so I am pretty sure I said, "Dude. Are you serious? I said I need help. I gotta go. I've got poop and bathwater all over the floor."
I think J decided that meant I had things well under control.

And two hours later.... mostly, I do. Have things under control. Sort of. Beans has been made more comfortable with movies and Popsicles. Little Nugget stopped wailing as soon as I returned her milk supply, and is now snoozing between meals. As soon as I can stomach it, I will be stripping down the beds and starting some laundry and cleaning out bathtubs.
For the record, I don't do barf. Even when I was a paramedic, barf was just not my thing. I used to make my partner clean it up ("Ah, lowly little EMT partner... I save lives, YOU clean barf.") Seriously. And luckily, my partner had a stomach of steel and could be bribed with a free lunch.

***

The weather report here is: Cold and snowy. We've had slushy rain falling for a couple days now. Snow in the morning and evening, rainy slush in the warmer afternoons (and by "warmer", I mean like 40F). I wouldn't call it a "white out" this morning, but I will say that visibility is limited. I can't see past the end of our block this morning.

***

Alright. I am being summoned with cries of "Tummy Hurts!" again. I've got to go catch some barf.
Hope y'all are doing better than we are here.

Until Next Time,
Happy Moose Trails!